Keith and I went shopping at Kohl's after he got home from work yesterday, and it was entirely his idea to go. We are going to his company Christmas dinner this Saturday and I needed something other than blue jeans to wear. We don't really want to go to the dinner, because why do you want to spend any more time with the people you have to work with than you already do? But, for good PR, you really have to go to these types of things. Plus, the quarterly bonus will be given out at this dinner, and if you don't go they won't give it to you until January as punishment for not showing up. It's not a huge bonus, but a couple hundred dollars is worth going and sitting through a company dinner I suppose. Kind of like they have to pay you to show up.
We have to bring two gifts for the gift exchange to this dinner, so we whipped in and out of walmart and got a Halston cologne gift set for the girl and a pocket knife gift set for the boy. I love those gift sets already packaged up and ready to go! Maybe I'll just pick out my own gift since I like Halston (ala Kevin on The Office with his foot massager).
And, then we went to Kohl's for the clothes. When Kohl's first opened in our area I really wasn't all that impressed with it, I'm not much of a department store shopper anyway and lots of the clothes are just plain old ugly. But, every time I've ever bought anything there, it's always on sale. And not a crappy 10 or 20 percent off, but sales like 40 and 50% off. All the time.
So, we start heading for the fatties department, and Keith is all confused over the miles of racks of clothing, and how do womens sizes run, and look at this sweater, this is nice, how about this one? Hello, Keith, you are looking at the juniors section and that sweater might sqeeze over my head, but that's all. I'd be walking around with a sweater on my head and my fat belly and boobs hanging out underneath it. Well, what size do you wear? he says. FAT size, I said. Well, I'll find you something over here, let me look, he says. Keith, listen to me, you will find nothing to fit me here, we have to go to the fat girls department, believe me. I was standing in the middle of Kohl's trying to explain the unexplainable about how womens clothing sizes work. Loudly.
So, we finally find the fat girls department and find that the sweater I bought there on sale a few weeks ago is on sale again, and I really like that sweater and it's very comfortable, so I should get another one in red this time, but they are way up on the wall where you have to get that hook thing to get one down, so Keith goes off to find the hook and get me a sweater. I found a couple of dressy looking jackets to try on and some black pants that are styled like jeans so I might actually wear them again. I tried on both jackets, which were like 68.00 each but on sale for 40% off, and decided on one of the jackets, even though it would need to be dry cleaned and I would never wear it again anyway. But, it will do even though it's a waste of money. But wait, I see one of those fake shirts with a sweater vest thing in white and grey, not fancy but businesslike and something that I will actually wear again, and something that is more my style. And on sale for 40% off. I tried that on, liked it, and tossed the jacket onto the discard rack. I got some cheap fake pearls to dress up my shirt a little, and so I will go to the holiday dinner in something that will be comfortable, but probably totally underdressed. But, I don't care.
Keith was telling me stories the guys at work had told him about previous holiday dinner parties and the gift exchange where one of the guys got a regifted used spice rack that had kitchen grease still on it. He was also advised that the boss will watch everyone very closely to make sure they are a 'team player' and not a drunken idiot who gets wasted at the company dinner and makes a total ass out of himself. Hopefully Keith won't do that.