So, for the past three weeks I have been quite indisposed with what I'm going to call amoebic dysentery because both the doctor at urgent care and I think that I am afflicted with an intestinal parasite, specifically giardia but I'm still not sure because the tests aren't back yet. Anyway, amoebic dysentery sounds more exotic (like maybe you are a world traveler) than just plain old DIARRHEA! Which is a horrible word. I could also call it flux, Montezuma's revenge, the runs or the trots. We'll stick with dysentery for now.
When I went to urgent care last Sunday they drew blood to check that just in case, which all came back fine, and then sent me home with a stool sample kit. I also hate the word stool unless you are talking about a piece of furniture to sit on, but I suppose it sounds a little better than feces. The kit comes with a collection bowl that unfortunately looks a lot like a hat (chapeau, bonnet, sombrero, tam o'shanter, take your pick) so of course Keith had to wear it while I was inspecting my kit and getting it all ready for my next trip to the bathroom.
The only good thing about amoebic dysentery is that I've lost a few pounds, but this is really not a good way to lose weight. Kind of like back in the 30s when you could buy tapeworms through the mail as a magic diet solution.