Wednesday, February 4, 2009

This Job is Killing Me

When I worked in an office, I always had this tiny fear at the back of my mind that I might suddenly drop dead at work (how embarrassing that would be, especially considering the part about losing control of your bodily functions when you die) and would anyone notice that I was dead or if they did, would they just be pissed off that I didn't get my work finished first and now they'd have to do it, which would totally ruin their day.

So, today I see this on

I'm going to assume that this office was kept as cold as the one I used to work at, and that's why nobody noticed any strange smells coming from his cubicle, his body must have been preserved by the cold air blowing down on him from the air conditioners that were constantly set at just above freezing.

And, I also wonder that nobody noticed that this man had not moved in five days, not even to get a cup of coffee or go to the bathroom, because in every office there is the office cop that keeps track of how many times you get up from your desk and how long you are gone for.

This would be a great plot for an episode of The Office. Toby dies at his desk and nobody notices.

And, now, how to drive your cats even nuttier than usual:

1: Get out the broom and the swiffer mop.
2: Go into the bathroom to sweep and mop.
3: Shut the bathroom doors (our bathroom is one of those long narrow ones with doors on each end.)
4: Sweep and mop the bathroom floor WITH THE DOORS SHUT!
5: Open the bathroom doors and find cats at each door frantic because THEY COULDN'T SEE WHAT YOU WERE DOING IN THERE AND IT'S DRIVING THEM CRAZY!

Works every time.

1 comment:

jomamma said...

The Hubby swears he'll never retire, he's going to die on the job so they will have to clean up the mess. It's payback.