Driving Aimlessly Around Bakersfield

So, this morning I asked my husband, Keith, if he wanted to go to the swap meet at the fairgrounds and look for junk. Since anything is better than him doing his list of things that need to be done, he says okay.

Me: We need to stop at the bank and get cash.
Him: Yes, I only have about $1.00 and they charge to get in.
Me: (Noticing well dressed people knocking at my neighbor's door.) Well, then, let's get the fuck out of here, because here come the church people.

So, we get in the car and drive, drive, drive, about 10 miles down the road.

Him: We forgot to stop and get cash.
Me: Well, maybe there's a bank downtown, but I'm not sure where.

So we turn towards downtown and start driving through seedy neighborhoods, admiring the views of dirt yards, trailers-no, not trailer parks, just trailers-, houses with their Christmas lights still up-it's August, and lots of run-down liquor stores and motels.

Me: We could just stop at an atm somewhere, but they charge you to get cash.
Him: Turning down another street.
Me: Oh, let's just go home and try this another time. Hey, why are we going down this street, we're heading out of town.
Him: Turning down another street. Because I don't want to go down that other street.
Me: We could stop at walmart and buy a pack of gum and get $100.00 cash back.
Him: That's an expensive pack of gum.
Me: No, they don't charge you, if you buy something you can get cash back with your debit card.
Him: Turning down yet another street and reaching over and patting my knee. I'm sorry I got us lost. Turning down another street.
Me: Lost? I thought you knew where you were going!
Him: Where ARE the fairgrounds, anyway?

So, after about 45 minutes of driving around, we end up back home. Hot, cranky, and with no junk. And still no money.