What is the new middle age? According to Hollywood standards, you should look young, thin, wrinkle free, and fashionable at all ages, but hey, in real life, we don't all have personal trainers, personal shoppers, personal chefs, personal plastic surgeons, and personal assistants to coordinate all of the aspects of our lives. So, what's middle age these days?
Forty? Fifty? Sixty? Is fifty really the new thirty? Hmm...
Well, here are a few signs of middle age, just in case you are not sure if you qualify.
You buy those blue jeans with the elastic back waist and the tummy control panel in front.
You still go out to dinner, but you like to get there at about 5:30 to avoid the crowds.
If you forget your reading glasses at said dinner, you have to hold the menu out at arms length to be able to read it.
If you did remember your glasses, they are either bifocals or trifocals.
You don't have an ipod and wouldn't know how to use one if you did.
You do not understand why anyone needs to text message.
The only blackberry you have is that jam you bought at the farmer's market.
You just don't get why kids want to wear their pants down around their thighs.
You find yourself muttering 'these kids today!' on a daily basis.
You enjoy listening to NPR
Loud music makes you cringe
At the newstand, you choose Newsweek instead of a fashion magazine.
You turn on the TV at 6:30 PM to catch Brian Williams on the Nightly News. Every night.
Your nightcap is metamucil.
On Saturday nights you can't stay up long enough to watch Saturday Night Live.
You look for the fiber content in all the foods you buy.
You need one of those daily pill organizers so you remember to take them all.
I do all of these things, so yes, your fifties are middle age, no matter what some just turning fifty year old Hollywood star says.